The Ache of Sin

by Chris Kusek, Audio Visual Coordinator

Psalm 38

Reading Psalm 38, I’m instantly struck by how truly horrible David feels as a result of his sin, whatever that may be. His “wounds stink,” there is no “soundness in [his] flesh.” I’m struck by a sense of curiosity - either David has committed some horrendous, unspeakable sin, or he’s really overreacting here.

But there’s a third option - it could be that David’s relationship with God is much stronger than mine is. I find myself thinking - what if this sin that David is so distraught over is actually something we today would consider pretty minor (or maybe not even sinful)? Maybe he told off a good friend or skipped temple because he felt a little under the weather or cursed God in casual conversation. I don’t know if I’m alone in my desire to hypothesize on the nature of David’s sin, and maybe it’s just my way of relating this Psalm to my daily struggles, but I like the idea that this sin or sins is something that we all might do on a regular basis. The reason is this:

If the sin that caused David this sort of agony is a minor one, think about the love and faith in God that demonstrates. I think we tend to take God’s forgiveness for granted, and use Jesus’ death for our sins as a way avoid guilt for our numerous minor transgressions (He already forgave us, so it’s not that big of a deal)

I know that I do this all the time. Just the other day, a homeless person approached me on the street and asked me for a meal. Not even money, but an honest meal. And I walked by apologetically, even though it was well within my means to provide one $7 meal for this man. I thought of David’s anguish in this Psalm and also thought of Jesus’ words: “Whatsoever you do to the least of My people, that you do unto Me.” I briefly found myself deeply apologetic and asked God to forgive me for what - on any other day - might not even register in my mind.

And I think that’s the beauty of this Psalm. It teaches us to be more appreciative of the forgiveness God has given us and to consider the fact that God is a living Being that - though we believe He won’t - has the ability to withdraw his grace from our lives at any minute. To have a true and deep love for God is to fear losing Him and the gifts that He gives his undeserving worshipers.

For I am ready to halt, and my sorrow is continually before me...Forsake me not, O LORD: O my God, be not far from me. Make haste to help me, O Lord my salvation.